Whelp, here I am in Japan!! Now what? Ah yes. Restroom. Follow the signs, become confused when I can't find a door, finally find them tucked away under some stairs. They use evary bit of space they have, that is for sure. I opened the first stall and came face to face with my first Japanese-style toilet. I blanched, and decided I could wait. They are nothing more than a trough in the floor.

So. Phone. I needed to call Katie. Phones are EVERYWHERE. Hundreds of these little grey forms, hunched over at all kinds of different heights, scattered everywhere, tucked behind duct work, hiding under trees. But, no I have no change. One 1000-yen note later, I possess a phone card with a picture of Kansai Airport on it. Now, I just have to figure out how to use the phone. The phones are incredible, too. They have full-screen LCD displays on them, and all kinds of buttons and slots. They even have Modem and ISDN ports on them! But they don't have english instructions on them. I punt. I stuck my card in a slot, and pushed number buttons. "Moshi-moshi?" "Moshi-moshi konichi wa! Katie?"
After a short period of terror, Katie confirmed that she was the voice on the other end of the phone. She said to wait in a central location, and she would come get me. As I hung up, the screen on the phone briefly showed a picture of a little girl bowing to me. I laughed.
Did I tell you about the rumble strips? Japan must be a great place to be blind. Every path is deliniated with little nubby tiles. These tiles play havok with the wheels on my luggage, but you can get almost aywhere by following these things. Also, EVERYTHING talks. Elevators, walkways, phones, ATMs. They all talk. And crosswalks play music or chirp. Trains ping. Constantly. [your door is ajar... :) -john]
Finally, after Katie picked me up and we went to sleep, the last foreign thing of the night happened: A police car passed the hotel, with a foreign high-low siren.
Wow. I'm really in Japan...

<7 Jan 1999> Day 1: Going home
Katie had to get back to her home in Ichinomiya pretty early for her first day of work, so after a not-very restful night of sleep, we headed out of the hotel and started for the Kansai Station. From there, we took a 50 minute train from Kansai to Osaka. The train, which was empty at the airport quickly filled up as we reached Osaka. In Osaka we stopped for something of a breakfast. They weren't selling lunch just then, so all we could get was a little sandwich. It was maybe 8cm on a side, filled with a little cucumber and some other things. Oh, and a hard boiled egg. They cut the crusts off of almost all sandwiches. It was really pretty, but I was beginning to have serious doubts that I would ever find enough food to fill me. Katie seemed to agree. We stopped by one more store before catching our next train. This one was a bread shop. Here, among melon-rolls and chocolate dipped rolls, we found some creame-filled donut thingies. They are like American creame-filled donuts, except that the filling is not as sweet. It was almost more of a cream-cheese filling than a sweet custard. They were very good, though. We hopped onto an express train to Nagoya. This was a longer trip that weaved in and out of the foothills. It becomes clear pretty quickly that the Japanese use every possible scrap of land. If it doesn't have a narrow road or a building on it, it is probably a garden or small farm. In one place, a little triangle of land in a valley near the railroad tracks was cultivated. This triangle could't have been more than 6 meters on any side. Any other land is either densly forested or on a steep hill.
The ride was beautiful, though. On one curve, the hills parted to show a huge golden statute simply hiding in a valley. I wish I had my camera out... I'll get a pic on my way back.
Finally, we reached Ichinomiya station. A quick note about the stations: There are entire cities in these stations. Katie said that you can get everything you possibly could need without ever coming to the surface. "I can't navigate Nagoya unless I go underground."
So at Ichinomiya Station, we had to get some money for Katie. In a little room labeled "Cash Corner" Katie pulled some yen out of an ATM. (Ug. They talk...) Another quick note: I don't think the Japanese are really all that big on wasting the space required to have a swinging door. Because of this, EVERY place has sliding doors, and most of them, if not fully automatic, are at least motorized. The sensors are set close in, though. You can't open the doors just by walking by in the hall. But you can't just walk right through them. You stand in front of them for a second. Or push a little button. Closest thing to Star-Trek I've ever seen.
While Katie was at the ATM, her cell phone rang. Her neighbor from downstairs called to tell her that her packages arrived at the City Hall and asked where we were. It turns out Cindy and Mark were not more that 200 meters away, having lunch at Mos Burger. (Sounds yummy, no?) So, we went to go visit them and have lunch.
Cindy and Mark are from Australia. They are way up there on my list of the nicest people I know. Katie ordered us some Mos Burgers. They are regular old burger with a kind of bar-b-que-ish sauce. It is really pretty good, but once again, the serving sizes are...well... eye opening. The french fries (chips?) were yummy. Cindy and Mark offered to drive us to the apartment complex.
Ohhh yeah. Driving in Japan. Don't do it. Mark is a really laid back guy. He calmy navigated us through the narrow streets (I paced one road out to be five paces wide!) Driving is on the wrong side of the road, and the steering wheel is reversed as well. Left turns confuse the hell out of me. Parking is generally not allowed on the streets, but people do it anyway, making for an even more exciting drive. Add in blind corners (many intersection have mirrors installed), numerous confusing road markings (Mark:"They love white paint here... I don't know what they all mean...") and hundreds of other impatient drivers, and I can see why all the guide books suggest against driving. Stop lights are horizontal, and they all seem to be timer-based. The timing on some of these lights is atrocious. I finished half a chapter in my book at one stop light.
We also visited a grocery store and a hardware store. Each was really neat in their own way.
So anyway, we roll up to the Gaijin Ghetto, as Katie calls it. It is another stark grey building, with white metal railing that are quickly yellowing with rust. I can write an entire book on Katie's apartment. It is a Japanese apartment in the classic style. The front door is a light hollow steel that reminds me of school lockers. The floors are covered with rattan matting. She has a western toilet (thank God), but everything else is classic Japanese. She has no hot water. That is, the kitchen has a hot water heater for the sink of the instant-on variety. The shower also has one, but you must go through contortions to get it to light. Showers are interesting, First, you fill the tub, a cube about a meter on all sides, with cold water. Then, you fire up the heater, which cycles the water in the tub (Stir every 15 miuntes) Then hit the switch on a little electric pump, and shower away!! If you have enough warm water left in the tub, crawl on in! But the tub is only for soaking. In Japan, you lather and rinse outside the tub, so that other family members can use the water in the tub. The washing machine is a wonder. No agitator poking up the middle, and the buttons to control it are like a copy machine. It even beeps when you push buttons. It proably holds more than the washing machine I have at home, when it comes down to it. Her microwave has a Rice button, but not a Popcorn button.
Later, we joined Cindy and Mark for dinner. They served (Insert Name Here - Shubu Shubu?) - a somewhat random stew of leafy greens, "pig meat" (Oh, you mean Pork?), fish, three kinds of mushrooms, carrots, and onions in some sort of broth [They only told you it was a normal meal, they actually just cleaned out the fridge. -john]. It is cooked in front of you, and the smell tantalizes. I ate three heaping bowl of it, including what probably amounts to an entire filet of fish. I also ate the whole thing with chop sticks. They offered a spoon and fork, and I was almost insulted. Despite Katie's teasing, I found I can work chop sticks pretty well.
They have an adorable kitten that they have to get rid of. I said I can't take it. Ryan would kill me.
At the hardware store earlier, Katie bought a kerosene heater. Good thing, too. Without it, the apartment could get unbearable. There is only a single electric heater on the wall, and an electric heater under the low table. (Keeps your legs and feet toasty!) The futons are topped with a huge down conforter. I didn't get cold in the night, and slept quite well.

<8 Jan 1999> Day 2 - Going Out on My Own
Katie has to work, today. It is actually her first day of work. She is nervous, first because it is her first day, and secondly because she is sending me out into the world on my own. We walk together to Futoga station, and ride the three stops to the main station, Shin Ichinomiya. There, Katie transfers to another train, and I stay behind. But she leaves me her phone.
In America, if you have a cell phone, you are a yuppie [Really?! I think that America sure had a whole lot of yuppies then -john]. In Japan, if you don't have a cell-phone, you are crazy. The slouchy green payphones are everywhere, but still everyone has a phone. They are incredible, too. Most appear to be of the J-phone type. They are made by Toshiba, are about 3x8x1cm big and light as a feather. The Nokia models in the US are bricks compared to these things.
So, now I have to kill the day. I spent the first few minutes just familiarizing myself with the station. I did a lap around the station exterior and discovered a big map that would turn out to be very handy. Using a set of landmarks, I started exploring the city. I would pick a direction, and start walking. Usually, about half a kilometer away, I would turn around, and see if I could still find my way back. Then, I'd look at the big map again, and start walking again. While I was out, I was looking in stores and on the streets. A CD costs $25, and the #9 selling CD was Mariah Carie [John, you get a better spelling for that?] [Umm, no.. -john] They sell the tiny CD discs as singles, and also carry a selection of mini discs. Vending machines carry a coke for $1.20, cigarettes, beer, whisky, coffee (in cans) and almost anything else you want. Playstation games run for about $60. The playstation and the N64 sell under the same names, here. But the SuperNES is a Super Famicom. And what is the PC/FX?
I found my first Dojo, or temple. There was no roman lettering anywhere, so I wasn't sure if I was welcome there. I didn't go in. I would wait until I had a guide. I started getting hungry, so I stopped at McDonalds.
Ordering there was made much easier by the picture menus on the counters. You simply point to what you want, and just smile and nod as the person behind the counter babbles on in some foreign language. "You want me to wipe the floor with your burger?" "Yeah, sure. Do whatever. I'm okay with that." I ordered the combo pack and a cheeseburger. A combo is SMALL fries and an 8oz coke and costs $4. It was pretty good, and maybe next time I'll know to order bigger. Or I can try something different. The menu also lists "Frank Burger", "Chicken Tatsuta" and "Teriyaki Burger". Oh, and the apple pies sell along side the meat and potato pies... The restaurant is pretty slow, and there are only a few school-girls in the place [Should I ask what promped that comment?? -john]. They are obviated by the school uniform--suit jacket, pleated skirt, and big bunchy leg-warmer-looking socks over black shoes. On my other side, the restaurant looks right into a clothing store. While his mom shops, a little guy is staring at me. Are we that fascinating? I hear Gaijin (foreigner) sometimes, usually at train platforms, but it never sounds malicious -- just a statement of fact.
Later, while wandering through a stationery shop, I noticed a bunch of kids on the stairs, doodling on the wall. The drawings were spectacular, all in the manga (Japanese Comic Book - think BIG EYES!) style. And they were just doodling these out. I watched as long as I could.
Through the day, I walked back and forth to the station. I easily walked 5k. Every time I went through the station, I tried again to buy a postcard from the machine by the postoffice. It never would accept any money! There is some construction going on outside the station. Construction is a little different over there. They have an actual PERSON who stands there, keeping you out of harm's way. They install temporary rumble strips at the crossings. They hang little planters on the construction fencing. Oh, and blinkelopes (ie, flashing barriers) are different, too. They are all poofy plastic, and the light is a barrel-shaped orange globe on top of a flashlight-looking case.
That morning, Katie bought me a set of tickets, to make it easier for me to get to and from Shin-Ichinomiya. I wasted one ticket when I walked into the station, only to discover all the station maps are outside of the station. Then, the station maps weren't helping at all, being all in Japanese. I was beginning to panic, too, since my feet were killing me, Katie was an hour overdue calling me. Suddenly, as I was sitting underneath the station sign, I was struck with inspiration! Hey! That big symbol up there is the same as the symbol on my tickets!! That other symbol must be HOME!! Using this new found knowledge, I hopped on the train, and rode away. Immediatly, I knew something was wrong. We were going the wrong direction. I got off at the next stop, and waited for the next train going back to Ichinomiya. Katie chose this moment to call.
Her phone is set to play some song when it rings. I blush whenever it rings. And it rings loud - especially on a train. I suppose I could turn it down, but I haven't bothered -- it usually buried in my pocket, and then at least I know it is my phone that is ringing. She says I got on the wrong train. Well, yeah. I know that.
Finally, I broke down and showed my ticket to a platform train-man. Along with the flood of gibberish, he pointed me to a train already waiting for me. As I limped home, the wind started to pick up. I nearly lost my hat to a drainage ditch, but was able to rescue it. I walked into the apartment and started to take a shower.
I dropped the soap [Grrreat.. just what we needed to know :) -john]. It fell between the wooden platform and the tub tank, where it is dark and damp. If any beast was going to attack me in the apartment, this would be the time. But I retrieved the soap without too much trouble.
I helped Katie prepare dinner. The damn kitchen is not made for tall people, though. It killed my back to be bending over the counter like that...
The wind is fierce. It is rattling the windows pretty severly. Katie tells me "You should be here during a typhoon." She burrows into her down futon cover. On the other hand, I am kind of relaxed by it. It is somewhat similar to sleeping on a sailboat, with all the creaking and clanking. I slept quite well.
Oh, by the way, thank you to John, who is putting these updates on my web page for me. Say Hi, John [Hi john -john]. Internet access here is pretty cheap, but you are metered for local phone calls. The lag is not bad at all. I even telnetted in to our school computer, Holly, just to test things out. It was about 1am in Colorado, and 4pm here. Nobody was on line to talk with... Probably a good thing. Ohhh my feet are sore...

<9 Jan 1999> Day 3 - Nagoya
After Katie left for the day, I watched TV for a while. When the kerosene heater shut itself down, I figured that it was about time to leave. Outside, I was greeted with 4-8cm of snow [it just struck me, when you set foot across seas, do you studdenly start using metric?? -john]!! Fun, since this place probably doesn't have a single snowplow. The only thing stranger than seeing those tiny trucks driving around real roads is seeing one of those tiny trucks with tire chains. I took a photo. (We're talking CSU-groundskeepers trucks here.)
Katie has decided to loosen the leash a little more. This time, she sent me off to Nagoya. This is a longer train ride, and is a much bigger city than little Ichninomiya. More important, the train situation is a little more interesting - there are also subways!!
Fortunatly, there are also more signs in English. For that matter, the Subways speak English. So, carrying the phone again, off I went to Nagoya. No problems getting there. I picked up a cinnamon twist and a melon-flavored roll on my way out. The bread stores are kind of neat. When you walk in, you grab a tray and a set of tongs. Then, you take your stuff up to the counter. I have to keep reminding myself to not leave the tongs at one of the trays. Without Katie, I tend to stick to restaurants that are somewhat self service. It is much easier that way.
So anyway, I come off the train in Nagoya, and am blasted with cold wind. So, I cross the street and wander into a building, becoming quickly lost. I went down some stairs, and when I came back up another set of stairs, I found I was right back where I started. It quickly became apparent that Nagoya is riddled with an underground city. I can not navigate underground, so I studied some maps and started on my way overland.
The first step was the television tower. It is an imposing, but kind of ugly tower. It is a great landmark, though. Between it and the twin towers on the station, it was pretty easy to find yourself. The tower is at the beginning of their Central Park. If you keep walking, you go through a really neat park. The paths wind through various trees and bushes and fountains in neat forms. Then, you cross this really neat suspension bridge over the main street. On the other side is the Los Angeles monument. They are sister cities, so Los Angeles has a monument there. At the foot of the monument are the hand and footprints of people like Clark Gable and Marilyn Monroe.
Beyond that is an Aztec Calendar, from presumably a Mexican sister city. It was quite a shock to find Spanish writing and Aztec symbols out here. It was kind of refreshing! While I was walking the park, I kept seeing numbered stairs going into the park. I was too busy goggling all the big buildings. I was somewhat impressed with the homeless shelters in the park, too. For being built out of tarps and pallettes, they are really well built. One even had a porch. I thought it would be poor taste to take a photo.
Finally, I reached the Nagoya castle. Truly beautiful. I was in awe over the simpler things. Like walls. The wall, though, really aren't that simple. They are HUGE! Made with fitted stones. The grounds are pretty much open, too. They have some areas fenced and roped, but others had no limits. You would just step off the the gravel pathway onto a dirt trail up onto the moat walls. I took some neat pictures there, but it was on pictures 25 and 26 of a 24-exposure roll of film. I skipped taking a picture of any of the at least three cats that were wandering the grounds, chasing the pidgeons. I did take a picture of the birds and deer? in the moat, though.
Inside the castle, which incidently is a ferro-concrete fake since the original was flattened in WWII, is a museum. It was kind of neat, but I wasn't allowed to take any photos, and couldn't read half of the displays. The only thing I really wanted to take a picture of was this rabbit helmet. It had a fierce rabbit head on top. I thought it was hilarious! I'm thinking Monty Python, here. "A fierce rabbit so foul! With big pointy teeth!" Incidently, this castle is famous for the pair of golden dolphins on the roof. I dunno. I've never thought that dolphins have ever looked that messed up. But I digress...
I was getting sore feet again, so I thought I would take the subways back. It was at the next stop that I realized what all those exits on the park were -- below the entire central park is a huge mall. I was soooo lost down there. I gave up and hopped the subway back to the main station.
While I was waiting in line for the train to Ichinomiya, someone behind me said, "Fort Collins, eh?" I am wearing a New Belgium Brewing baseball cap that says Fort Collins, Colorado on the back. This guy, Aaron, and his quiet Japanese girlfriend are standing behind me in line. We talked about baseball, the weather, microbrewing, and general being-a-Gaijin. As we finally boarded the train the discussion moved on to Japanese rudeness, how to smuggle drugs, and where to get the best stuff. The whole time, Aaron is talking quite loud, and is quite outspoken on so many things that I wouldn't talk about on a public train even without language barriers. It was nice to talk to another American, but he embarassed me completly. It became clear why Americans aren't respected outside of their country. There are enough loudmouth, cocky travel kiddies out there to ruin it for all of us.
As I was rolling up to Ichinomiya Station, Katie called me on the phone. She always calls me when I'm on the train! I met her at the station, and we headed home. At home, I watched some TV. It was kind of neat to watch Japanese Animation in Japan, since I had watched some [SOME?!? hah! -john] of it stateside. Here, however, they don't have the english subtitles, yet. That makes it a little more difficult.
Despite the cold, Katie took me out for Yakiniku - "cooked meat". This is the kind of place where you order a platter of raw meat, and cook it yourself on a little gas grill in the center of the table. It was SOOOOOOO good.
Tiger Woods sells canned coffee on TV, here... The commercial came on while we were watching the 5th Element. They show US movies on TV before the US shows US Movies on TV. The dialog isn't subtitled, but the onscreen displays (like computer screens and signs) are. Huh. Tomorrow we head out to Kyota!

<10 Jan 1999> Day 4 - Kyoto
Katie and I woke up pretty early, and although we missed our early train, it was almost better that way. We caught them all lined up and simply stepped from train to train. We got to Kyoto in record time. It was not without its problems, however. The snow has continued, blocking trains in some parts of the country. It was some 20cm deep around here. They do not handle snow very well, here. Furthermore, I cannot figure out how Katie's pipes never freeze.
We took trains to Nagoya, where we hopped onto the Shinkansen. This is the world's fastest train. Or it would be, if not for the snow. :( I was actually more impressed with the smaller line's express trains. With their shuddering and squeeling, you know you are going fast. The Shinkansen, on the other hand is just fast and smooth. It is truly a delightful way to travel.
About 10 minutes outside of Kyoto, the dreary clouds and snow suddenly parted. We must have passed through a front of some sort. The change was incredible. Snow, clouds, WHAM, sun, green fields.
The JR station in Kyoto is a marvel of steel and glass bent into tortured shapes. It is really beautiful. We navigated through there to an English speaking help desk person. (Yay!) Who handed out a fine selection of ideas, including a "Romantic walk along the Path of Philosophy". Katie and I both sort of blushed, smiled, and nodded. But after a crowded city bus ride, we ended up at the pathway.
Kyoto city busses are interesting. They don't have too many seats on them, but the seats they do have a really nice. They have velvet coverings on them with pictures of old chariot-looking things. You enter a bus at the back door, and leave out the front. The whole time you are riding, a voice is chattering away on the PA telling what the next stop is and what that stop is "convenient" to. Its even in english, sometimes.
The Path of Philosophy is a winding path that follows a narrow river. All along the east side are shrines and temples. On the west side are tiny little family stores and restaurants.
Katie immediatly got me to taste some of the local wares. I tried a bar of ... well, it was rice paste. Rice is pounded into a mush, and this mush is formed into bars and cooked with some sort of flavoring. Katie loves this stuff. I thought it was just too much chewing for no flavor. Next, she had me try a cracker. Well, I'm sure it had some fancy name, but it was more or less a big, poofy soda cracker with purple stuff shaken on it. (Dad! I may have found it!) Katie was asking expectantly if I liked it. Well, its a cracker. I can't say I really like crackers... To make up for it, we got a crepe filled with banannas and cream.
The first place we visited was Ginkaku-ji. The temple is, quite honestly, kind of run down. But it was my first look at the manicured gardens. I was floored. Water, moss, trees, and sand are all arranged into neat patterns. There is even a perfect cone of sand, almost 2m high, with the top cut off square. It is supposed to look like Mt. Fuji. I'm not sure about that, but I was pretty impressed that you can stack sand that neatly.
We stopped at a really neat store that was full of mobiles. You know, the things you hang from the ceiling? It was a really neat store, and I was sorely tempted to get my mom another "Fish From Tijuana" (Inside Joke). But they were expensive and small. They would be dwarfed in a western home.
We had Okonomiyaki for lunch. This was another cook-your-own experience. The lady comes out from the back with a metal bowl filled with strips of meat and cabbage. There is a single egg in the middle. This and some other things get all mixed together and smoothed out onto the grill. The effect is something like potato pancakes. They are cabbage pancakes with meat. It was very good. Katie also got some noodles. Suffice to say, I have not yet starved, here. The food is always excellent.
The next temple we went to, I'm not sure of the name. I don't think it was actually mentioned on any of our guide maps. It was so well worth it, though. This shrine uses the hillside to its advantage. A pathway climbs out of the mountain to a pagoda with an incredible view. Something becomes odd about here though... How is it these really short people can climb such tall steep steps?? Wearing the guest slippers, that were never meant for Western consumption didn't help, either. My pair had many of the straps pre-broken, so they fit a little better.
So many of these places didn't allow photos to be taken! It is truly a shame, for words cannot possibly express how impressive some of the sites there are. Gold hangs from the ceilings, rich wood througout, silk, paintings, and carvings galore.
Near the end of the Path, we came across a big, Roman-looking bridge. Katie and I walk up to the sign (which is all in Kanji). She is unfamiliar with the words they are using, and can't translate for me. I ask "well, is it a bridge or an auqaduct?" A man on the other side answered me. In english. It was about here that we begin running into other Gaijin. I was a little put off by it, really. I had this selfish notion that I had Japan all to myself. It was kind of a let down to see more tourists.
We walked the remaining couple of blocks to our hotel. On the way there, we were accosted by rickshaw drivers. They are very convincing, and their english is excellent. One followed us for a block and a half!
We checked into our hotel, and didn't even look at the room. We immediatly left for the Heian Shrine. This one is easy to spot. It sits just behind a huge red tori gateway. We're talking HUGE, here. The shrine is a big layout of buildings that are all bright orange. Unfortunatly, aside from the beauty of the buildings, the place was a total let-down. It was crawling with tourists and tourist shops. There was nothing to see there, but there was a lot to buy. We avoided the rickshaw drivers on the two-block walk back to our hotel. The room was small, but I had come to expect that. The bathroom was a single unit, where the faucet for the sink swings over to become the tub faucet. We had a rotary phone and a small TV with a coin slot. At least the view was good.
We went to a nearby restaurant and had quite possibly the worst meal we've had since coming here. We were trying to eat Udon, but Katie was not impressed with what they served. I had to agree. Watery noodles in a weak broth just don't do it for me. We visited a convenience store on the way home. I got a carton of orange juice and a little cup of ice cream. It was green, with a picture of a leaf on it. Seemed safe enough. On the way back to the hotel, Katie makes the turn too quickly, so instead of walking on a major street, we wind through the back alleys. It was kind of spooky, but kind of neat on its own.
Back at the hotel room, I quickly discovered my mistake with the icecream. It was green tea flavored. It isn't bad, per se. It is just a real shock when you are expecting Mint. I couldn't finish it.
Suntory Drinks sells a beverage called "C.C. Lemon" 50 Lemons worth of vitamin C in every can. It has a catchy jingle to it. Katie started singing it and now I can't stop. So if I come home singing "she she remon!" you will understand.
Full House is on TV. I never watched that in the States. I'm not starting now. I woke up a few minutes later to notice that I wasn't reading my book, like I thought I was. I was so tired, I dozed off without even knowing it.

<11 Jan 1999> Day 5 - More Kyoto
Having a car here is a status symbol, but not in the way you might think. If you have a car here, that means you actually have room to park it somewhere. If you do have a place to park, then you must protect that place from other people. Most homes appear to have movable bollards or chain holders, that they can use if they need them. Large villas have gates. But some of the smaller ones have something similar to the garage-door opener of the West. They have a chain-lowerer. When you push the button, the chain slides down its tracks into a trench in the driveway. You can then drive over it. The chain comes back up behind you.
We were wandering the streets waiting for our first destination to open. To my left I saw a cat, stretched out in the gutter. It was kind of cute, until I noticed the crusty eyes, and siezed jaw. There was a dead cat lying on the side of the road. Katie was immediatly disgusted. I was disgusted on a somewhat higher level - did this cat die in this location, in this position? Or did someone throw it out with the trash? Either way, it was not a nice way to start the day.
We went to the Kyoto Crafts Center. It is just a big department store filled with kimonos, swords, dolls, lacquerware, prints, and everything else. It was all pretty expensive, but Katie and I still managed to spend over one hundred dollars there. They took credit cards, though. :) They had electronics on the top floor, including some nice watches. I still didn't buy one, though. They also had some nice MiniDisc players. But they are painfully expensive over here, too. I tried to hear WWV or WWVH on the world band radio they were selling there. Those are the two USA time beacons in Fort Collins and Honolulu. I couldn't hear them, though. The Offspring's song "Pretty Fly For a White Guy" was playing on the radio, there. [...speaking of why we have no respect there. -john]
After that, we went to Nijo-jo - the old capitol building of sorts. It is a huge layout of buildings (7,300m^2) with some absolutly incredible carving work put into them. The palace building has 33 rooms and 800 Tatami mats. The building will be 400 years old in 2003. The floors are all designed to squeek. As you walk, it sounds like you are in a field of birds. They call these Nightingale Floors. The trick is that you are not able to sneek around. I kicked off my slippers and tried sneeking in my socks. It didn't work. And Katie thought I was nuts.
On the next bus ride, we were passed by four lowrider minivans. They looked sooooo silly. From my high perch on the bus, I can also see a lot of dashboard navigation systems in use. But then, I suppose with roads like Japan has, you really need them.
Our last stop was Kinkau-ji - the Gold Temple. This temple is covered with gold leaf. The effect is really strange. It sits across a still pond, and almost looks fake. (This is aided by the fact that it actually is fake, being a reconstruction, but that's not what I meant.) When the sun comes out of the clouds, the effect is dazzling. I suspect that there is a LOT of film burned up, here.
And now, for some more observations:
A convenience store, Japanized into something sounding like "conbeenee", is the center of any neighborhood. It is here where you can buy train tickets, pay your bills (personal checks don't exist here), get news, send mail, and everything else. They range from local styles to Circle-K's and 7-11's.
Taxicabs are more or less all black. They are all very nice, with lace on the seats. Nothing like your typical DC cab. The doors open and close automaticly. Most of the car models here are names I have never heard of. They all come from Toyota and Honda, but the model names are just strange. Taxi's have green licence plates, most cars have white. A yellow-plate means that the car is run by a lawnmower engine, so it has a lower insurance rate. A lot of Peaugeot (?) and BMW's, here, as well. Many cars have a little wand to indicate where the left front bumper is. They have mirrors set really far forward, and sometimes have a mirror that dangles over the rear window, presumably to help parking.
We took the Shinkansen back home. We pass the Nissen plant on the way. They have a giant Cup Noodles sign out front. Mark met us at Ichinomiya station to take us out to dinner.
Okay, imagine this: Take a tomato. Slice it up, take all the goop out from inside. Now, peel it. Okay, now, salt it a little, and DOWN THE HATCH!! This is the closest thing I can think of to sushi [hopefully you were aiming for a slightly more appetizing image than I got from that. -john]. The better ones truly do melt in your mouth, and are gone quickly. But others are salty and fishy. I actually did pretty well, though. I ate quite a bit. The final straw was the Salmon, though. All these others didn't have recognizable names, so I could just pretend I didn't know what they were. But then, the salmon...

I worked in a restaurant once where it was my job to portion salmon. I know the shape, texture, and color quite well. I know the pain it is to scrape all those damn scales off the butcher block when I was done. I know the slimy feeling of fish. I know what salmon is.

<12 Jan 1999> Day 6: More Nagoya
Kyoto cleaned me out. It was a $100 round trip on the Shinkansen. I was in desperate need of more money. I figured the best place was The International City of Nagoya. Yeah. It sounded like a good idea.
Getting out of the apartment alone was a major chore. It took all my self control to force me out of here. But, out I went.
The gutters here are deep. They are trenches about .3m wide and about that deep. Usually, they are covered by little concrete plates and steel grates, making them serviceable sidewalks of a sort. I'm just always afraid that I will not watch where I am going and fall into an open one. You could turn an ankle pretty good. For that matter, there are plenty of opportunities for turning ankles. Japan isn't a country of lawyers, so there are plenty of places to injure yourself. Here, they credit you with enough intelligence not to fall off walls. It is kind of refreshing, compared to the padded-room mentalitly of litigation-minded America.
Anyway, the gutters are needed during the rainy season, I'm told. The amount of water must be something. There is moss everywhere. Also, I suppose the gutters can serve as irrigation ditches. There are all kinds of little farms everywhere. One of Katie's neighbors has a little garden that looks like it is full of Bonsai Trees in Training [Speaking of Bonsai trees, you have one at home now. Also for a good laugh, go look at Bonsai Potato. -john]. I didn't recongize anything as edible. It just looked like abunch of little trees.
I ate breakfast at Mos Burger again. They serve really hot and fresh food. It is really, really good. I begin to suspect that the Japanese can do burgers better than the USA, too... A Large Cola here is only a medium in the USA. The waitress came back to pick dead leaves out of the real plants in the back of the store... No plastic plants for them! Oh, they play American music on the PA. Actually, a lot of places do. It makes me feel a little more at home.
I stood behind a person today with a shirt that said:

<13 Jan 1999> Day 7: Bumming Around
I just saw Katie, Mark, and Paula on TV. They were doing the Hokey-Pokey with a bunch of kids. I saw Mark on TV earlier, while I was waiting for a clue in the station. Apparently, it happens a lot. The job that they do is to travel between schools, offering english classes, and in the case of Cindy, offering tastes of different cultures. She goes on school visits regularly, where she will tell kids about other countries. When she tells of her own, she brings in boomerangs and has the kids build little ones out of popsicle sticks. (That was what was on TV.)
It is horribly evil, but I have been teasing Cindy almost without mercy about her accent. I've started calling her husband "Mawk". While we were out driving, I was trying to tell a story. She couldn't understand my accent. Jokingly, I swung into my best British/Australia accent, and tried again. Katie slugged me, but Cindy was almost ecstatic. "I can understand him now!!" I smile whenever she says to put something into the boot. We had a big talk about it, however. I didn't realize it was a big problem. She says she often compares notes with Katie - in one case, Cindy wanted to call a garden path type of trail a "parkway", despite the highway connotations that has in America. It is no big thing, but it could be significant.
Mawk's birthday is tomorrow. We're gonna go have a big party. I owe them something. They have been our taxi service more than I care to admit.
Here are some observations about TV. TV controls don't have a numeric keypad in the normal sense. They have 1-12 buttons. Channel 1 is used here, 13 isn't. Cable TV is available, though, and you can see a lot of tiny dishes on people roofs. HDTV is here, and they have the TV's for them. They must be still pretty prohibitive, though. The only place I have seen them is in the Airport (Which charges $25 or so just to be there) and in the Pachinco Parlor (which had two in a row. More later.) The picture is beautiful, though. They had a display of carrots on the TV - they weren't doing that NTSC red-creep at all. When I was walking around in Nagoya, I came across a TV crew filming in the shadow of the Nagoya TV tower. They had two ladies sitting on a park bench. Three guys walk over and start talking. Then one guy blows a whistle, and a crowd erupts around them. They all kneel and say something. After a short exchange, one girl yells, and drags the other girl away from the park. I wish I knew what the hell was happening...It was kind of funny.
I forgot to mention in an earlier post about the school kids I passed. While I was walking home from the station, I crossed the path of what seemed like hundreds of little kids. They all had their dark school uniforms on, but EVERYONE had a bright yellow cap on. It was one of the most adorable things I have seen.
When I first got here, Katie and Cindy were telling me about zero-days in Ichinomiya. They said that the police only enforce laws on days that end in 0, like 10, 20, and 30. I laughed politely, but wasn't so sure I bought it. When Kia corroberated, I guess I had to believe it. Its still kind of humorous, though. Kia was going to find a place to park. "Is it a zero-day? No? Then I'm just going to park on the street."
I spent the afternoon in Nagoya again. This time I braved the underground. It is a rat maze down there, and you can quickly become lost. However, the signage is great. Eventually you can find a subway station. Once you do that, you are fine. I found a really neat comic book shop. I found others, but this one wasn't as busy. Unlike American comic books, these are about paperback book sized, and they usually sell the entire series. In America, you can't find last month's issue a month later. So this place was packed. After I left that store, I was at the end of an underground hallway, so I headed back up to the surface. There, I quickly became lost, and found myself in some of the seedier parts of Nagoya. I passed my first "Night Club" there. They had pictures of the dancers out front. They were clothed, but I guess they had to stick a blackout box somewhere -- they all had a black strip across their lips. Beats me. I didn't stick around. The TV tower I mentioned is a great landmark, but it doesn't help when you are surrounded by tall buildings.
The people in Nagoya are a very fashion conscious people. It could be because of all the designer stores in the big mall... Anyway, right now big shoes are all the rage [AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! -john]. I mean a good four inch lift, all the way up the calf, fuzzy suede boots. They are hideous. Katie laughs because "Even with those heels, I'm still taller!" Many of them have full-length wool coats that look really nice, though. They are very flattering to a community full of skinny people. On the rise is the style of wearing camoflauge. I passed one girl in green camo pants. It wouldn't have been worth mentioning if they weren't FUZZY [it's so you can hide in the moss better!! -john]. They were like fleece or something. Katie says that the colors are not always standard, either. Pink camo, for instance. Trum would freak out [I have a beautiful mental image of Trum in fuzzy pink camo... bwhahaha -john]. Katie is just relieved that the leopard-skin thing is fading. I have to agree. It is kind of freaky. Jeans can cost almost $200, here. Katie said I could sell mine for a pretty good price. Hmmmmm... I'm reminded of that Levis' commerical: "In Prague, you can trade them for a car."
Back in Ichinomiya, I ate McDonalds again [the whole restaurant?! -john]. Big Mac's are still in the foam boxes, here. I also found out that the bank I was so trying to find in Nagoya has a branch here -- and it is JUST across the street from Ichinomiya station. Argh. Oh well.
Katie and I had better Udon this time. for lunch. We stopped first at the 100 yen store. (They have them here, too!!) She got a mug, I got some little jello-thingies. They are okay, but they taste a little like something you'd get at a $1 store. (grin).
Afterwards, we went out for my first experience with Pachinco. The place is LOUD and smoky. The machines only take ¥500 pieces ($5) for a handfull of balls. But how hard could it be? There are people down every aisle, with BUCKETS and BUCKETS of little silver balls!! Hey, you just turn the little knob, here, and you just win, right?
Fastest 1000Y I've ever spent... I can see why this place can afford multiple HDTV screens. It is a beautiful building, too. But I was just a little too annoyed with the whole thing. We walked next door to the Circle-K. You might be interesting to know that Final Fantasy 8 is soon to be released. They rent Playstation games at Circle-K. For that matter, you can buy a Playstation for 18000Y there. [but can you get CD-R blanks at 7-11?? -john]
I mentioned vending machines, I think, but did I mention what was in them? Most machines have both a hot and cold selection. The cold seclection includes things like C.C.Lemon, Coke, Aquarius, Pocari Sweat, cold tea and cold coffee [no pepsi?? good! :) -john]. The hot side has hot tea and coffee. Most dispense cans, but there are some machines that dispense cups with ice. They are all made by what seems to be the big-3 beverage makers: Kirin, Suntory, and Calpis. Calpis is a disturbing one. If you say it fast enough, it sounds like "Cow Piss". I have to admit, I have been sticking to Coke. I have seen a few Pepsi's, but they are few and far between.
I'm running out of days. They are sure they could find me an apartment here in the Gaijin ghetto, though. In the next couple days, I have to finish up my shopping, re-pack for the trip home, and tour Osaka. We plan to go to the Osaka castle, and visit the Matsushita pavilion. Here, I get to see all the high-tech stuff that Panasonic is working on. I'm excited about that. I'm not all that excited about going back to work. I have a beautiful vision of passing out at my desk. It's gonna be strange...

<14 Jan 1999> Day 8: Winding Down
My stay here is winding down. I don't have a lot left to do, though. I have a lot of shopping to be done, but Ichinomiya is not your best place for touristy things. I could bring you all a circular florescent bulb, but I just don't that that would do it. Mark (Mawk?) tells me that the major industries of Ichinomiya include textiles and fashion kind of things, but I think I found out different. I think the major industry is Travel. There are sooo many travel agencies in Japan. One wonders when the population has so many ways to get away... To give the fashion thing credit, there are some nice stores, here, but even if I had a clue about fashion, Katie assures me that nothing would fit anyone I know.
I tried one of the hot drinks today. I had the Georgia Signature Cafe Au Lait. It was kind of good, really. But there is just something really disturbing about getting a can out of a vending machine that is hot. Metal can, mind you. Hot. The neat thing, is that this can is small, and perfect to fit in a pocket. They make great handwarmers! I can't see a mL number on this can, but it is... lets see, 13cm x Pi * 2.5^2 [FREAK!! -john]. If that's right, its only about 230mL My she-she-remon can is something like 350 [for the sake of comparison, a 12oz coke can is 355mL -john]. It's dinky. Putting cold and hot drinks in a single machine is kind of clever, really. Especially if you are using Peltier effect units to heat/cool, but I digress. I'm getting too geeky, here.
Anyway, Georgia is made by the Coca Cola corp. I would think they would know better than to bandy around American names. But who knows. (Coca-cola is based in Georgia, though, yes? [affirmative -john]) If bad english was all they imported, things would be okay. Unfortunatly, we send them much worse. You see, our infomercials are dubbed into Japanese and broadcast, here. It seems to me that thay have a 24hour infomercial channel, here. They are so similar to US ones, it is truly frightening. The salesman shows one neat feature after another, slices tomatoes, cleans up pop spills, etc. But the differences are there. For instance, the vacuum-pack bag things that you use in the US to compress your bulky sweaters is used instead to compress bulky futon covers. They also have a shopping channel, here. If you suffered a stroke, and couldn't comprehend english, you wouldn't be able to tell the difference between an American and a Japanese shopping channel.
For all that their TV technology is really far ahead, they aren't very creative with it. They still think blue screen effects are cool. I saw a news short on the auctioning of Mark McGuire's (?) 70th homerun baseball. The background of the news set was a bluescreen. Instead of cutting or fading to the story, they brought it up in the blue screen, then zoomed into it. The effect being that the anchors seem to fly toward you. Sheesh. My bosses at CTV would have killed me if I pulled off a transition like that in a news show [yeah, you know that campus news brodcasts are highly competetive for ratings... -john].
I have decided I need to get a video tape of some of the TV here. I think that is the only way, short of getting my own video camera to show you some of the sounds and sights I have seen. I just watched a news short about those tall boots that annoy the hell out of me. Apparently, they don't breathe too well, and these poor girls are getting some skin problems. Awwwwww. On another channel, they were going through this girl's room. She had painted everything in her room pink ("Peen-ku!"). Most frightening was that she had two bunny suits in her closet [bunny furry or bunny intel?? -john]. One white, one pink. Then, when she and the show's host went out for dinner, she wore some...teddy bear ears? Which brings up another common theme on TV. They drag cameras into restaurants, just for the hell of it, it appears. In photos, Japanese girls give the two-finger "Peace" sign. Guys put wrestling moves on each other, it appears. (shrug)
John is giving me hell about the Guinness I had a few nights ago. To be fair, I set a foundation for that Guinness with a nice, tall glass of Sapporo. The Guinness was better [duh.. -john]. Sapporo is just like Budweiser. It is a light lager with nothing to commend it. Budweiser, incidently, sells "Buddy's" here. Its a 6.0% alcohol brew. I really enjoy the irony of having a Guinness in Japan. It cost 600Y. Not bad, really, since a CocaCola is 500Y. Refills are unheard of, here. When I left the bar, the big guy (forgot his name) said "Michael, here is your bill." Clear as day. Wow. Tell Norm "Hi" for me.
I don't think I told you about the bicycles here. (Dying for grep(1) here...) [had to resort to vgrep(2)?? -john] There are millions. They don't really have a parking garage under Ichinomiya station -- they have a bicycle park. There are very few mountain bikes. The only ones I have seen have been in Kyoto. Instead, all the bicycles are OLD. Even the brand spankin' new ones are old. By this, I mean they have chain guards, baskets, big fat seats, and fenders. The neat thing about that is that nobody would think to steal them, I suppose. If you want a lock, they can be had in the 300Y store. Not very many bikes are locked, here. Two of the bikes parked at Futago station require mention, though. One had Alabama plates on it, the other had California plates. [now that's a pretty long ride -john]
I spent quite a lot of time today in CD and book stores. I don't want to leave without a tiny CD single and a cheesy magazine and comic book. The CD would be simple if I liked Mariah Carrey or Celine Dion. Finding anything else is made difficult by the organization of the CDs. They are in Alphabetical order. Makes sense, you say? What if you don't know the alphabet? I found a CD I could stand to have, though. They have that Offspring CD here, but not the single. Damn. I'll try again later.
The magazine search is another problem entirely. I'm afraid of what I will pick up. Imagine someone walking into a book store and picking up "Gay Foot Fetish Weekly Personals" and flipping through it. This is the fear I have. I picked up one magazine that... umm... well, I blushed and put it back in the rack. The computer books have an AOL CD inside worth 50 hours of online time. Shouldn't that be JOL? Half of the magazines I can skip right over - these are the ones that feature Brad Pitt, Leonardo Decaprio, or Golder Retrievers. They must like blonds, here... Anyway, you would think I could just open up the book, flip through it, and figure out what kind of magazine it is. Well, it doesn't work that way. To protect the book and, quite possibly, keep you from reading it in the store, almost all books and magazines are shrink wrapped or tied shut with ribbons. The back cover is usually useless, too. If you can't decide based on the spine or front cover, you don't buy it. I didn't buy anything. I need help on this one.
I'm getting 26 photos out of 24 exposure rolls of film. Hmmm... At the Fuji Film Store, some lady was outside giving out little packs of kleenex. Apparently it is a common free-bee. Katie had cases of these little kleenex things that her kids gave her.
I just had to help Katie's neighbor Paula turn her power back on. It must be a common problem. Common enough to make it easy to remedy. The main breaker is located above the front door. To a typical Japanese person, it could be considered to be in a high place. So, the main breakers have a cord hung on them, so you can reset them from the ground. Katie says hers will trip if she uses the microwave and the heater at the same time. It looks to be difficult enough just to plug all her stuff in. Heater, fan, stereo, TV, VCR, computer, and table heater. She's run out of plugs long ago.
Japanese people are as rude as any westerner when it comes to crowd situations. But they do one thing that is kind of neat. At stoplights, they turn their headlights off, so other drivers and pedestrians don't have a stare into them.
For Mark's birthday, we went to "Rockin' Robins", which is their idea of an American style restaurant. They are not quite there. The place is absolutly covered with 50's memerobilia. We're talking Marilyn Monroe everywhere. They serve Coors there (No Guinness...) [it's better than bud.. -john]. The music is this really kind of neat mix of 50's music mixed in with a little big-band stuff. However, after an hour there you've heard all the music they had. I had an American Beef Taco there. They don't quite have it. They had a tortilla, though, which I was impressed with, and it was very tasty. It just wasn't a true American taco -- or burrito for that matter. The BLT's were pretty amazing, though. Again, they use HUGE slices of bread, here, and the bacon is really thick, as well. It was easily the heartiest BLT I had ever seen.
Afterwards, we went out for Karaoke. I wasn't so sure about this. I was under the impression that Karaoke was when you stood in front of a big crowd and embarassed yourself. But actually, you rent out a small room, and only embarass yourself in front of a select number of your friends. It was really a lot of fun. I tried doing the Scatman!! I didn't do too bad. Unfortunatly, its a pretty simple song after you spit out all the words. You should have heard "Sweet Child o' Mine"... I had to sit out when they all sang a Puffy song. Puffy is a Japanese band. I didn't know any words.
Tomorrow is my last day, so this will probably be the last report until I'm back in the States. I will be sad to leave. The people here have been great to me. I shudder at the thought of going back to work, nevermind how jet-lagged I will be. But then, it was really hard to drag me away from work. I'm sure I'll stay entertained. I'll have to find me some Japanese cookbooks, though. And a big bag of chopsticks. So, until then...
(1) Grep: Generate Regular Expresion and Print. Used to search text files. I am such a geek.
(2) vgrep: Our little inside joke of how people can visually scan text and actually find anything. We are that bad..
[Anyhow, I'm about to head down to DIA for the second time today. I'd have to say that I actually enjoyed this little chore of editing and posting his trip updates. -john] [Ahhh, John. If only that was the end of the story... -mdwyer]

Day 9: My Last Hours
The last hours are going quickly. I have the morning to pack, and then we hop on a train and begin my trip home. The train to Nagoya is uneventful. The train ride from Nagoya to Osaka, however, would easily go down into a nightmare. We failed to grab a full express train, and so must stop at a number of stations on the way. Time isn't an issue, though. I have till midnight, really. But there is an older couple directly left of us. The man is sucking his dentures or something EVERY TEN SECONDS!! Katie and I both put on headphones and tried to drown out the sound.
The train passed a disc golf course. I was rather suprised at that. For a country of limited space, they sure seem to have some bad uses of it. Like real golf, for instance. But they do their best. Katie says that some courses will have three holes on the same green. More prevalent are the huge drivng ranges, with their multi-story tall nets.
Osaka is a wonder. The trains, that I really do enjoy so much, get even better here. Some of the subway lines are simply BEAUTIFUL! I have been into luxury hotels with uglier lobbies. The sounds that trains make are neater, too. Instead of the typical bings and screeches, these trains have a little flute tune they play. Its a neat effect!
Sounds are a very prevalent thing in Japan. Many seem to be designed with human thinking in mind. The kiosks for assiting blind people ring with a ding dong tone that says "Yoo hoo!! Over here!" The more modern train crossings ping with an insistent tone that leaves no doubt that a train crossing is dangerous. Many of the older crossings are still in use, though. They have a cheap tin-sounding bell tone. Up close, you can hear the mechanism clinking and cacking and whirring. All the crossings have gates, though...
So anyway, we hop on the Osaka Linear Motorcar 7000 (Translation: Subway Car. It calls itself that on the display sign.) and head out to Osaka Castle.
Remember how I said time wasn't a problem? Well, I lied. Japan rolls up the sidewalks as soon as the sun goes down. Osasa castle was closed when we got there. We still got some great pictures, though, and I picked up some souvineers at the shops. After that, we navigated our way to the Matsushita pavilion. This is where Panasonic (Or National... or Matsushita.. or whatever they call themselves) shows off all their neat technologies. Unfortunatly, they were in the process of rolling up the sidewalks when we got there. I could only look in the windows and drool.
When we passed a Subway store (the Sub Sandwich place), I couldn't resist. We went in, and I got a Japanese Sub Club Card and a stamp on it. I can't wait to see if they will accept it in the States.
As time was running out, we visited a few more shops and stopped for one last bit of refreshment. Then, it was off to the station, for my last train out to the Kansai airport. At the gate, Katie and I said our goodbyes. It was really tough. I am really excited to come back again some time. Everyone here was soo nice to me...
My card is slipped into the wicket, and I go to find my train. The Rapit is the singularly most ugly train I have ever seen. Its external surfaces are all purple. Its nose cone has the look of the Ultraman face mask. The windows are all giant bulbous circular things. Inside, the decor is fine wood panels and leopard skin seats. I caught the pimp train!! Worse than that was the actual NAME of the train. I was on the "Rapit Beta" Augh!! Beta? Like, as in one step farther than ALPHA? Did they want me to submit bug reports on it?
Before I found my seat, one of my bigger fears came to pass. A janitor on the platform, with more silver in his teeth that the typical dining room set, tried to talk to me. He laughed and walked on his way. Damnit. Way to make a fool out of myself. At least it didn't happen until I was well on my way.
As we were pulling out of the Nankai station in Osaka, we matched speed with a local train on the next track. The look of all the people wedged in there was not one I would soon forget. It was really surreal.
As I was sitting in my seat, a feeling of all being not well quickly arose...
As the hideous purple beast of a train hurled closer and closer to the Kansai airport, my feeling of unrest grew and grew. Was I sad about leaving? Yeah, but that wasn't it. Something just nagging in the back of my mind... My flight is listed as today at 12:30am. AM. Ohhhhh.... Oh shit.. My pulse raced as comprehension dawned. I cursed every deity I could think of, and I even made up a couple. I pulled out my handy notebook, I have been using to record memories of my trip for one final entry:

My worst nightmare just occured. My plane left without me 20 hours ago.

<15 Jan 1999> Day 10: Crisis
Shit shit shit... Oh, god. What do you do when you miss a flight? I've never missed a flight before, let alone in a place that is as far as humanly possible from your home. To know that your home, your bed, your shower, your LIFE is not available to you -- I was terrified!
Douglas Adams, in his "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" book, says that all creatures feel and radiate a stress level in direct relation to how far away from home they are. I was broadcasting stress.
"Katie? I missed my flight. I don't know what I'm going to do. The counter opens in two hours, and I'll see what happens then."
After a few hours, my watch, still set on Mountain Time, says that it is 6am. I call home. Here is the first hint that not everything is against me. As I finish entering my calling card number, the recorded voice comes on to tell me that I have free time on my calling card, and I won't be paying for this call. Wow. I had no idea. Put AT&T on my list of good-guys. After a brief pause, my dad answers, sleep in his voice.
"Dad?" That phone call was easily the more horrible thing I have ever had to do... My poor mother. I'm trapped a world away, and there is nothing she can do for me...
After gathering my wits, I finally get to talk to the ticket agent. She takes my paperwork and steps back for a hushed conversation with another agent. When she returns, she is holding my booklet of tickets. I feel something akin to Mary Queen of Scots, who proudly strode to the executioners block - before having her head cleaved open when the executioner missed...
But all my fear was for naught. She handed me a freshly minted ticket onto the next flight. The sister flight, as it were, to my own. It left at the exact same time, just one day later.
"But this flight is delayed until 2am. They are serving a box lunch at the gate."
I cared so little. It was all I could do not to hug the lady. She warned me that I may have trouble in Los Angeles, but she could at least assure me that I would get to America.
I should probably mention here that I did have a cohort of sorts. Jason and I started chatting before the counter opened. It was a good thing. I needed someone english to talk to. I think he did, too. He was there for a month!
Anyway, to get to the gates of Kansai, you must pay a $26 usage fee. Its a magnificent airport, and they have novel ways of paying for it. I was forwarned, and so forarmed with enough leftover yen. Jason was not so lucky. So, he had to locate an ATM, and quickly. There were two located there, one a PLUS system, and one a CIRRUS. In case his didn't work, I got ready to use mine, and had it fed into the machine. After taking my card and pin, it locked up and said on the screen to call on the telephone beside the ATM.
Apparently, these machines close at 23:00. Exactly. No room for error, here. When closing time came up, the machine shut itself right down. After a brief and almost heated exchange with the non-english speakers on the other end of the phone, they assured me "30 minutes!"
Ug. What else could go wrong?! Thirty minutes later, a technician from ASS came and rescued my card. I got a kick out of the patch on his arm. Ass. I wasn't about to make fun of him, though. I was just happy as hell to have my card back... Especially since it was the one with the free long distance on it.
While waiting for the plane, I rummaged around the little shop. There, sitting in a box, was a dozen of these little birds on a sitck. They were black, with a big yellow beak, and huge eyes. When you pull a trigger, the bird opens its beak, flapps his wings, and says something in a nasal Japanese. I was laughing so hard. I used the last Yen in my pocket to buy it. It would turn out to be maybe the only thing to keep me sane.
Other than that, the flight was more or less uneventful. I sat next to a little young girl and her dad. We didn't strike up a conversation, though. It probably wouldn't have helped, anyway. He was stuffing "Beginning English" books back in his bag as we left the plane. I slept fitfully, and ate little, still too nervous about what would happen at LAX.
After landing, we were all herded past a drug sniffing dog, who found me mildy interesting, and into the customs line. Nothing in America could scare a foreigner more. First of all, you must find the correct line to get in. In Japan, this is simple - if you have black hair, you go in the "Reentry" line. If you don't, you go in the "Foreigner" line. In America, it isn't so simple. There is such a diverse mixture to our population. I could truthfully not tell which line I was in. I found the right one, though. Fortunate, too. The customs lady tore into a woman who was in the wrong line. I smiled weakly as she stamped my passport.
The next step was baggage claim. What a mess. Good God, people. PACK LIGHTER! Now, to be fair, many of the people on that flight had been over seas for much longer than I. But JEEZE! I was there for 1/2 hour easily, trying to find my bag. While I was searching, I was questioned by a customs agent. It wouldn't have been a bad thing, except that he asked hard questions. Questions like "How long were you in Japan?" Well, hell, I don't know. I was supposed to be there ten days, I thought. But I'm not really sure anymore. Hell, I don't know what DAY it is! He checked my declaration form, and pointed out that I had it filled in wrong. He straightened me out, and left me to continue searching for my bag. I found it, and passed through the doors into America. If it wasn't LA, I might have kissed the ground.
So now what? Well, might as well see what United would do for me. I walked the quarter mile (I'm in America, now! No metric!) to the United ticket counter. I handed my booklet to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'm in trouble." With little more of my explanation spoken to her, she said she could put me on a flight leaving in about 15 minutes. "Is that okay?"
Okay? Is that okay? That's excellent!! What do you mean OKAY?! Another airline worker almost got a hug.
I soon had a ticket for flight 1713 leaving at 8pm. Ironicly, the same flight number of the plane I was supposed to catch the previous night. As 8:00 came and went, I still wasn't on a plane. I called my parents, and quite lost it on the phone. We were talking about who would pick me up from the Airport, and if I would mind spending the night in Denver with relatives. "I hope you understand," I sobbed, losing all the dignity I had worked so hard to maintain. "I just want to go home..."
Soon after I hung up, the PA came alive to announce that our plane was beyond repair, and we were changing flights. I nearly died laughing. It was too much. As I picked up my bag to go to the next gate, the bird triggered. My carry-on bag was shrieking in Japaneese. Everything is okay! I'm ticketed to Denver, someone will meet me there, and I will sleep in my own bed!
We all filed on to a 757. I sat between a woman about my age who had just returned from somewhere in China, and a flight attendant. I listened to CDs for most of the trip.
After a white-knuckle landing, where crosswinds were twisting the plane, we pulled up to the gate. Mentally and physically exhausted, I sat in my seat until the crowds thinned. When I finally rounded the last bend of the jetway, I could see Ryan and John standing there waiting.
I made it.